Z to A of Sensual Massage

L is for Lubricate

When I was young and naive I used to wonder how many babies it took to make one bottle of Baby Oil?  You know the stuff, it’s that clear oil made by the company beginning with J.  Now that I’m slightly less young, but still rather naive, I realise of course that they don’t make it out of babies. It’s used on babies… and it has other uses, one of which is as a lubricant in massage. So because we’re now on L in the Z to A of Sensual Massage the word for this post is Lubricate. L for Lubricate.

I don’t recommend Baby Oil is used as massage oil though. It can be used as massage oil if it’s all you’ve got but I find it too thick and greasy to be good for use in massage. I prefer to use different oils for massage….which we’ll cover later in this post because I’d like to talk about where Baby Oil is used as a lubricant. What I’m referring to is the use of Baby Oil in naked oil wrestling…. Did you know that naked oil wrestling was a thing?

I like combat sports. I like watching MMA (Mixed Martial Arts) and boxing and I love punching and kicking a punchbag and sparring with a partner. It’s excellent for fitness, keeping your mind sharp and is a great stress reliever. Obviously I don’t go out looking for fights, that’s not a good idea. I’ve studied martial arts which teaches you to avoid situations where it may be necessary to use your self defence techniques. If avoiding the situation doesn’t work then you learn techniques to ensure that no fighting takes place, or you only resort to fighting if it’s in self defence where there is no alternative. All sensible stuff.

I like sex. I like watching sex and eroticism, and I love having sex with a partner (or partners….why not?). It’s excellent for fitness, keeping your mind sharp and is a great stress reliever. Obviously I don’t go out looking for sex (actually it sometimes comes looking for me). I’ve studied sex ……you get the picture where I am going?

Yes…combat sports and sex… These are a few of my favourite things (with apologies to Julie Andrews). Let’s do some algebra: combat sports + sex = naked oil wrestling. Now that’s something that definitely gets my interest!

I first watched naked oil wrestling at a gay nightclub in London. It was one of those clubs, you probably know them…where you dance, drink, and get to know people (some of them intimately) in a naked environment. In reality for most of the evening people stand around watching other people standing around watching people.

It’s a people watching overload session where there’s always the hope that the hottest guy is yet to arrive. And then about half hour before the club is due to close and everyone realises the hottest guy isn’t coming there’s a rush to find some action with anyone who is as desperate as you are.

Anyway, during part of this evening, which to be honest is what attracted me to attend, there was billed a session of naked oil wrestling. Enthusiastic, and presumably exhibitionist, volunteers were sought to mess around doing naked oil wrestling for half an hour or so for the entertainment of the crowd.

The volunteers were covered in baby oil and paired up to wrestle each other in a large children’s paddling pool while the crowd encourages them with what could be described as instructions. It’s the way of these things that the volunteers aren’t necessarily those who ought to be doing a naked oil wrestling show, but there you go, you can’t have everything. A couple of the wrestlers were reasonably sexy once covered in oil and spurred on by the crowd.

I was quite tempted to volunteer to wrestle, but that voice of doubt that you get in your head when anything exciting but naughty is on offer started to talk to me.  The voice said that I’d inevitably dislocate my shoulder and end up being taken to hospital naked and covered in Baby Oil and how the hell would I explain that?

So I just watched as the guys wrestled each other. The sexiest couple (relatively speaking remember) progressed to sucking each other whilst the others, presumably not wanting to go that far, stepped out to let the couple take centre stage. As the couple slid various well lubricated parts of themselves into each other I remember being quite concerned about the baby oil going places it probably shouldn’t, but they didn’t seem worried by that.

Of course I guess the wrestling show was designed to get the crowd going, should they be in need of any encouragement. It worked very well because there was now much less people watching going on and much more close physical interaction. The friends I had gone with had disappeared and it was getting late so I found a hot guy who wanted his tonsils given a cum wash and gave him what he was looking for. Then I left for home, with the naked oil wrestling firmly imprinted in my imagination.

You know when an idea gets into your mind and over time it becomes an obsession. You start to see connections almost everywhere. You notice references to it that you’d never seen previously.  Call it fate perhaps, but you end up finding it, or it finds you. Either way it’s your destiny. It’s almost as if it was pre-determined that naked oil wrestling found me again, this time in a different location and in a different way.

Through a friend I heard about a private wrestling club that held regular wrestling sessions, including the occasional oil session.  The subtext was obviously erotic because guys at the regular sessions were encouraged to wrestle in speedos or leotards, and these could be removed to wrestle naked if they wished. The oil sessions were always naked and obviously were a little more challenging to put on than the ‘normal’ sessions because of the need to set up plastic sheeting to contain the oil. It all sounded ideal.

I knew the organiser so I signed up to a session. I’ve done proper combat wrestling, during martial arts competition, so I know how to get someone in some basic holds to submission. It’s a totally different prospect though when you’re covered in oil and naked. You have nothing to get hold of (insert your own jokes here…) so it’s almost impossible to get anyone into a hold and keep them there. It’s great fun though!  I’d recommend it if you’re thinking of taking part. Ignore that voice of doubt. I didn’t end up in hospital….yet.

So… what about using Baby Oil for massage? I don’t use it in my massage sessions. It’s too greasy and thick. For my massage clients I use Grapeseed oil, usually unscented. Grapeseed oil contains linoleum acid which tightens and nourishes the skin and it’s easily absorbed, so it’s great for massage. If you like scented oil you can also add your favourite scent to it. There’s one drawback; don’t buy white towels or massage bed coverings because Grapeseed oil leaves bad stains. You live and learn….

How much oil should you use in a massage? Well…the answer is ‘it depends’. If you are massaging a very hairy person then you’ll need plenty of oil. I’ve massaged some very hairy guys (no hairy women thankfully but there’s still time….) and if you don’t use enough oil it can be painful for the guy because their body hair gets pulled by your strokes. Use lots of oil to ensure your hands glide; he will be grateful. If it’s a hairy woman then my advice is that the oil is the least of your concerns…

Other oils I sometimes use for massage are coconut oil or almond oil. Both glide well and absorb but there is the risk that someone with a nut allergy may have an adverse reaction. I’ve used solid coconut oil a few times. It’s good because it’s less slippery than liquid oil and is useful if you want to work small areas with deep pressure. Make sure the room is warm enough though. I once massaged a guy who liked the room quite cold (who knows why?). The cold meant that the solid coconut oil I was using wouldn’t easily melt in my hands, which made the massage more challenging. Ensure the room is warm!

On the subject of temperature, I always like to warm the oil before the massage because it feels great to have warm oil against your skin. And that brings us back to babies… the ideal oil warmer is a baby’s feeding bottle warmer, it keeps the oil at just the right temperature all through the massage. If you don’t have a bottle warmer, simply boil some water and place your massage oil bottle in a cup of the hot water to warm it up.

And what oil should you use for naked oil wrestling? Who cares! As long as it’s slippery it’ll work. Just make sure that if a body part should end up inside you (by accident of course) that whatever oil you’re using will taste nice, so possibly use olive oil? Oh and if you end up in hospital you can always say it was a cooking accident…

The next letter in our sequence is K. Suggestions are welcome.









What do you think? Let me know.

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