“I’ll just leave you to undress to your underwear and get on the table” he said. “You can leave your clothes on the hook there and cover yourself with this towel. I’ll be back in a few minutes and then we can begin your massage”. With those words my masseur handed me the towel, turned and left the room to allow me to undress down to my pants.
I had that moment when you’re in a new place, suddenly alone, with some time to check out the surroundings. You know the feeling…the temptation to open a few cupboards and nose around is strong…at least it is with me. I hope I’m not alone in that! It was a standard spa massage room; sage green walls, low discreet lighting, piles of fluffy white towels (…so unpractical…my tip? – buy dark towels they don’t show the stains), pots of potions and creams available for purchase. Nondescript spa music played from some hidden speaker. A scent of lavender filled the room. A large teddy bear sat incongruously on a wicker chair in the corner of the room watching me, and…I’m sure it was silently judging me for being a bit out of condition. Aside from judgemental teddy bear it was all as expected. This was a ‘spa massage’.
Here’s the context…I was on a work trip abroad. It was for my regular job – not a masseur job work trip. That would be fun.. to do massage work trips: Any clients in hot and sunny places are welcome to book me to visit. On this occasion I was staying at some dull airport hotel and had some time to kill. So I thought why not try the hotel spa massage service? It’s better than staying in my room wanking to the porn channel (I wonder if any of my porn ends up on hotel TV?) and eating all the snacks in the minibar. Also it’s always good to do a bit of market research, and I could probably claim it on expenses. I’ve seen others claim worse stuff on expenses (vintage whisky at a strip club…hmmm). This wasn’t a sensual massage. I had no desire, or expectation, of anything intimate developing. I just wanted to relax for an hour or so and recover from the flight.
Alone in the massage room I took off my shirt and glanced at the teddy bear. His eyes said ‘you’ve let yourself go’. He was probably right, so I turned him to face the back of the chair…that’ll teach him to body shame me. I debated with myself whether or not to take off my pants too?…maybe the masseur wouldn’t mind. I could pretend I didn’t hear him, or even that I didn’t understand English when he’d question why my bum cheeks appeared from beneath the towel… On second thoughts maybe that’s not such a good idea. I decided to leave them on as requested and be a good boy today. Wearing just my usual pair of Aussiebum Classics (the black ones I think…always classy) I jumped on the table and tried my best to lay on my front and cover myself properly with a towel….which is impossible. Why do they ask you to do that? What are you supposed to do? Lay down and fling the towel back over your head? Lay it on the table and sneak up underneath it from the bottom? I just chucked it messily behind me in the hope it would cover me, and lay there waiting…
My masseur came back in. I didn’t tell you his name yet did I? He’d introduced himself as Alex. I think he was Russian, probably Alexei, but he said to call him Alex. OK Alex. Alex adjusted the towel so it covered me properly …. which was a shame. He could have said “oh lets not bother with this towel” but Alex was being proper.
He started to work on me, pressing down through the towel and getting me ready for more vigorous strokes. Then the towel was folded down, revealing my shoulders and back. Alex worked there. Then it was folded up, revealing my thighs and calves. Alex worked there too. Each time the towel was folded back to re-cover the part just worked. It was a good massage, I was relaxed, but the towel work was annoying. Then Alex worked my lower back and buttocks. However the towel remained in place, even though it was over my pants. Alex worked through the fabric of towel and pants which didn’t feel great. I wondered if he’d forgotten to remove it….”Alex, the towel’s still there, it’s safe to remove it… I left my pants on…and they’re clean”….but I just thought it to myself and kept quiet while acting annoyed (which is of course very English….). Only an English person would have the ability to act annoyed whilst laying face down on a massage table. Alex, not being English didn’t notice my annoyance obviously. When he’d finished my back and I turned over the towel covering my middle stayed in place. It was there all through the massage. It was a good massage, Alex was expert, but it definitely didn’t feel right remaining partially clothed. How do you get a proper massage through a layer of towel and pants? Even Alex struggled to achieve that.
For both sensual massage and for non intimate massages I do think you need to be naked. OK, I accept that spa massages can’t become sexy; they shouldn’t cross boundaries, that’s fine and good. It’s not ethical or appropriate to do that. No-one expects it (unless they have porn film fantasies), but I believe that being naked shouldn’t be associated with anything sexual. It’s only nudity, it’s not an invitation to get intimate with the client simply because they have nothing on. Just because my pants are off and my cock is out there’s no need to caress it gently to arouse it to its full 8 inch length and swallow down the shaft bringing me to a juddering orgasm…..Sorry…I got carried away there. Ignore the big cock sliding down the masseurs throat. Ignore it….I shouldn’t have mentioned it. Can’t get that thought out of your head now can you? It’s ok at this point to watch my demo movie on my website if you need an…er… break….
OK? Back with me? Good. There’s a film by Director Mike Leigh, from 1993, called Naked. It’s one of my favourites. Don’t watch it for much nakedness, of the physical sort, or if you’re looking for a bit of light entertainment. It’s raw and bleak. The characters are exposed as if they were naked, with nothing to hide behind. It’s not easy to watch, but I think it’s an intense and stimulating film.
Just like in the film, whether you’re having a sensual massage or a spa massage it’s best to be naked and not hiding behind clothes. The masseur can better manipulate and sense your body, without any cloth barrier to get in the way. Being naked means there’s nothing to hide behind. It does require a level of trust with your masseur, which is good for building a rapport with them. I often find that the better the understanding and trust between masseur and client then the better the massage. Nakedness helps to build that degree of trust.
So at your next spa massage, let your masseur know that if they’re ok with you being naked then you are too. I’m sure that you’ll get a better massage. Just make sure there are no judgemental teddy bears watching…
Next letter is M. It won’t be for Massage.