Older guys matter
Being an older gay or bisexual man, even in today’s liberated pc world, can limit your opportunities for physical affection, touch and relief. Not only can you have body image problems and may not be able to shoot as you once did, but as your world narrows the need for intimacy is just as great. Unfortunately, true or not, its easy to get the impression that it’s inappropriate to want, let alone have, even mild sex except very privately with a long-term partner. Even then, if anyone gets to hear about it, there’s likely to be a smutty chortle.
I’ve been in a committed partnership for many years and our knowledge of and love for each other grows deeper as each year passes. But health and other issues long since made us opt for separate rooms – although we often share a double bed when in a hotel – and even though sex has slipped off the agenda, we still hug and kiss a lot, if only out of habit. Yet, there’s still the need for something EXTRA.
Now in my seventies, my lively libido shows no signs of diminishing and I know I’m not alone. It’s not hard-core stuff I need, it’s being helped to still feel alive, coming away from the experience relaxed and exhilarated. A day out. An escape. Also, as a writer, it’s great getting to know other people and how they tick and can be a socially rewarding experience too.
Friendly sensual masseurs are a real gift
Escorts (though they often double as erotic masseurs) aren’t the ideal way of achieving release. Not only is one conscious of the extra health risk involved but, lovely though some of them are, I get the impression many are programmed to deliver an edgier kind of service. A friendly masseur, however, is a real gift. Because I don’t want to get too emotionally reliant on any one of them, I visit, in turn several masseurs in their ‘forties’ who make me feel, even if it’s only an illusion, that they enjoy seeing me. It’s just as well that my budget only allows one massage every few weeks!
Extra inches make the connection
I’ve tried younger ones, and they’re often charming but, understandably perhaps, unwilling to go those extra… erm …inches and make me imagine, for sixty or ninety minutes that I’m special. At the end of the day it’s a transaction. I’m not kidding myself it’s anything more – but it’s still nice if you’re able to connect.
I can tell when a masseur is put off by my years. However well-mannered, it comes across in their body language. The deciding factor is the nature of the hug and maybe kiss I get when I leave that makes me know I’d be welcome to return. ‘See you again soon’ means a lot.
I remember when I was younger, I avoided ‘dirty old men’ in saunas and on the Heath. A pity, because, even though we no longer have trim physiques, some of us are more than just a sad old body and worth getting to know.
Masseurs with the golden touch have helped keep me feeling young. I’m so grateful to them!
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Thank you Tom for sharing that beautiful insight. I see clients in their twenties and all ages up to those in their seventies. There’s no upper age limit for a massage, just some health requirements. G stands for Golden and I would say it also stands for Go For It. Don’t let age stop you from doing the things you like. Go for it!